Condicio sine qua non

The above Latin phrase literally translates to - ' Condition without which not ' or more easily 'an essential condition or a requirement'.

Why do i write a blog on such a phrase? I wanted to write about this for a while but now i think is the right time.

During my last ten years of work experience , one thing my managers have thought me is that never consider yourself 'Indispensable' , anyone in any organisation however senior or knowledgeable is always ' dispensable'.

In my early days of my career , i built up reasonably solid expertise in my line of work and as a normal human being i used to work hard and had that feeling that iam one of the most important person and considered myself all-important .

As our psychology dictates, we homosapiens are fond of having control and the knowledge which we build up comes out as making us believe we are indispensable and have absolute control in our line of work.

This habit in me continued for a while and without my knowledge i was being monitored. One fine day during late 2006-07 i was called for a meeting.

During this discussion , this habit was being debated and suddenly like a thunder my boss fielded me one  attitude changing question " What happens if you die tomorrow? What will happen to your department" 

What a game changing question this was to be. I did not realize it until afterwards. I paused and spent a lot of time thinking about it . 

After that particular meeting and following days of pondering myself , i came to the most mature conclusion and decision which has helped me ever since. I said to myself , never ever would i consider myself ' Indispensable'.

It has also made me look at things in a very different angle and also has made me grow because the moment one considers he/she is not indispensable , we understand and learn the art of delegating which in turn fuels growth.

Why do i write this after such a long gap after the actual learning experience? Coincidentally, as i wrote in my last blog, my marriage forced me to take the longest ever holiday in my career and during this three weeks of holiday , world did not stop moving , the institution that i worked for continued to operate as normal,there were issues in my department which typically i would be involved in were solved without any issues and when i was back to work , i amalgamated into the department without any issues.

All in all , the lesson i learnt few years back was re-iterated /re-played back to me with brute force.

I just wanted to share this as its one of the most important lesson to understand and a very effective tip to keep in mind while working for any institution.

Theen Haftha Ka Chuthi Katham Aur School Shuru!!

So goes a dialogue in the movie Zindagi Na Milega Dubara , dialogue rendered by Hrithik Roshan in a pub somewhere in Seville in Spain .

This dialogue is now applicable for me , as i write this blog , i finish three long weeks of holiday from work. This is the first time in a decade of my work experience i have taken such a long holiday .

This holiday was special , as it marked the occasion of my marriage , i did not know how the three weeks passed , it has passed in a wink .

The chores of these three weeks were very different than any of my previous holidays. This three week period included preparing for the big day both in office and at my home in London. Which meant i had to complete all my office work before i went on holiday and also preparation at my apartment in London where i would welcome my better half, so had to do lot of preparation in anticipation of my new life, it was long hours for more than five weeks leading up to my departure from London.

Apart from the preparations here in London , when i touched down in Chennai, there were a flurry of activities and time was never enough.

I had to hand out invitations to my friends and colleagues who are always special to me and who have always treated me as some one special in their life.

Post the invitation hand out , i had to oblige to the customary state of things during pre nuptial time. Four  days prior to marriage passed in a whiz.

The week post marriage was all consumed either visiting temples to fulfill  my parents prayers to the almighty. Four days of week two went completing all pilgrimage and the rest of the week went about as i had to visit relatives after relatives to pay the customary post marriage respects and have food with them , i never have had so much food in my whole life than in those three days.

Week three was full of making sure that my better half gets accustomed to new country, culture and place. So it was all about making her comfortable by taking her out to super markets, showing her different malls and sitting down and planning, overall week three has made me a guide of a sort to my better half.

Am back to work from tomorrow and its going to be one heck of busy schedule for next few weeks as we lead up to plan and close out quarter four targets prior to year end.

Its going to be fun as i try to balance my new commitments at home and busy schedule at work , am sure i might need some advice from some of my counterparts in the married league , am sure they will lend me some invaluable advice.

Chutti katham aur School Shuru!!

Looking forward to it.

Marriage Makes Many Things

This phrase has been said numerous times but i never did understand nor accept that Marriage changes a mans lifestyle.

Now i can confidently say it does. I can confirm this from my very minimal experience so far.

How do i confirm this , what better way than take myself as an example.

Prior to my engagement my world was reading books, watching TV specially F1, cooking & of course not to forget the small but the most important activity of all , working !

Ever since engagement , reading has gone through the window, i have struggled to keep pace with reading. I have been pushing myself to complete a book over the last two months.

Apart from reading , F1 has taken back stage , i haven not seen last four races , something that would have been unheard of in the last seven years.  This was all due to lead-up to the big day.

Two of the most important things that i did normally as a bachelor took back stage , so some other things should have taken centre stage.

Yes , there were a few that took centre stage,  i'll try to summarize these .

First of all, i gave lot of importance to becoming lean and fit, not sure why but may be subconsciously i might have been thinking to look and feel good on the big day. I slogged myself in the gym and was pushing myself to be on strict diet, it was no surprise that i refrained from fried and junk foods for more than 3 months and in the process lost a whopping 8.5 Kgs.

With weight taking one part of importance , the other one was managing my finances , notwithstanding my usual thought process of being careful in what i spend, i became even more careful and started planning things in the process. this did benefit me a lot as come closer to the big day i had next to no financial issues, something am very proud of.

So , looking good, being more responsible becoming a part of daily life one more key ingredient became a part of my daily thought process.

Surprisingly and something that is not synonymous to me had happened , i started smiling a lot and becoming more and more romantic.

My daily thoughts were along the lines of  how can i keep my better half happy and which ideas would impress her. Ideas came in a flurry and i did many things which surprised me and for which i never knew i had the guts nor the talent.

As the big day came closer and closer i started understanding what my better half likes and dislikes. One of the most important aspects was cleanliness , i slogged myself to keep my apartment spot on , neat and tidy.

Having said all that and now that the big day has come and gone , i look back and can affirm that marriage has definitely changed me!

Has it changed me for the better , maybe not because i looked at my life differently during phase 1 of my life & now my life is different , I've changed just because my priorities have changed.

So far so good, will i sustain this, only time will tell.

Note:- Sorry that i hadn't blogged for long ,  i will try and be back to normal asap.