Personal Life Vs Work Life

I feel miserable today, reason i could not make it to my cousins marriage,why?

I came from office late last night , i had to leave for the marriage early morning and today had truck loads of things to do in office!!

Woke up just in time but still was tired and had a long day ahead , so went back to sleep. Came to office and put in a grueling 14 hours but reality bites in. Why work so hard and compromise on personal things. I thought i could have done better today.

We are so enmeshed with work and spend on an average 50% of our available time in office that we think office is life .If we exclude traveling time and sleeping time , this percentage could well hit the 80 mark.

Even when we travel to and from office we only think about office and work barring few important occasions.

In reality,life is so beautiful that we miss many important things that do not come back to us . Those precious little moments,we miss them and then complain that life is dull and boring.

How many of us can honestly say that we really take good care of our near and dear ones . Many a times office work takes precedence that we even forego taking care of ourselves. I have seen my colleagues putting in 18 hour days , they haven't taken time off for themselves nor for their partners .

When subtly asked , standard answer is "We are young , if we do not work hard now , then when would we ?" Yes, that's true but at what cost . A sons first birthday or a marriage anniversary comes only once and a lost opportunity is lost for ever.

I have seen moms and dads in office who are furious on themselves because their son is ill and they are unable to take care of them or for that matter it is a marriage anniversary for them and they are barking at the stupid MIS which needs to be sent to someone.

We need to take conscious effort to try and enjoy our life because it is wonderful. How can we do that? Answer is planning things properly and ensuring that there is a divide between professional and personal life . If we can achieve this , then it would be a wonderful thing.

I need to try and do what i have said above and am still kicking myself for not making it to the marriage today!!!!

"Rubhino" The F1 Statesman

Its not my normal self to post two blogs in successive days ,quite unlike of me. However watching Rubens Barrichello win todays European Grand Prix in Valencia pushed me to salute formula 1's greatest servant and a true statesman.

Rubhino as he is fondly called has had more grand prix starts than any other driver in the world. Being in his late thirties, today he demonstrated to the younger generation how to keep your competitive spirit flying.

When Mclaren messed their routine pit stop for Lewis Hamilton ,boy o boy did Rubhino put the hammer down and set the track on a blitz .He showed supreme confidence and handled the Brawn Gp car to precision.He never looked back and neither did he slip . Drove the race absolutely inch perfect .

One can only get into Formula one if he is ultra competitive and being there for these many years and competing with drivers who are almost ten years junior to him tells us something about his fighting spirit.

Well people say age plays a big role in keeping ones fighting spirit going but Rubhino showed age has nothing to do with keeping onself fit,confident and moreover a will to win .

Someone like me who complains about hard work and all the stress,Rubhino has shown what's possible . Driving a car through grueling 57 laps under scorching sun, at an average of over 2oo mph and having to go through 5G lap after lap ,this was something extra special from him.Also teaches us lesson on what's possible.

What's more ,when he came up to the park his car ,there were all people rushing to congratulate him. The Ferrari's,Mclarens,Renaults. You name it everyone was there. Such is his charisma and being liked by so many people in a sport which is seen by many in the world as glamorous and politically driven says very highly about Rubhino.

Well done Rubhino , expecting more to come from him. When you hang-up your helmet,world will remember you as a great person and a true reflection of the competitive sport.

Savour this moment and bow my head down for a great sportsperson. Very special.

Hope he writes a Bio of himself,can't wait for that to happen.

I think i like him because he shares my birthday or rather i share his !!!!!

Frank Talk

I was being pushed to blog by my colleagues for the last two weeks. I just got sometime today to blog. Hopefully this is as interesting or as boring as subject like the others that i have posted . Opinions differ :- ))

Well what is "Frank" all about. Dictionary meaning states that "unbounded by anything or free" but it seldom occurs.

This week , i learnt how powerful "frank talk" is i.e. talk unbounded by anything ,very free and away from all the usual bull shit.

I learnt it from two angles , in one occasion , i was doing all the frank talk and in the next someone else did all the talking i.e. i was at the receiving end.

In the first case, there is this good friend of mine who was undergoing a harrowing experience in her professional life , there was a thought in her that she has not been performing well for whatever reason and somehow seemed to be out of place. She was generally a star performer and hardworking , something seemed to have been nagging her . During the few weeks that i observed ,it was quite evident that there she was not enjoying and something was seriously wrong with her . No idea what it was tough !

Deciding to help , i spoke to her , to talk her through and see what was happening and try and see if i could do something to help.

Unbelievably , as the conversation started, i found out that it was a simple problem of over expectation and the problem boiled down to this " I was all along a Super Performer and i am unable to do that now?".

I spoke for about one hour almost non stop as if somebody had written the dialogues for me beforehand and i had memorized it to the pause. Speaking with genuine concern,explaining what i saw as the problem , telling the strengths as i saw in her ,the potential weakness and giving no bullshit . I was stunned by myself as i ticked all the boxes for a great frank talk. The answer was instantaneous ,this person now became extremely positive and more importantly cheerful. Ever since i did this talk,she seems to be doing well and keeps telling me that weight has been taken off her shoulders . I don't know if performance indeed has improved but certainly happiness has returned .

Next in line was me at the receiving end of the talk and that happened just today.On some issue i was arguing with my mom for a week or two and was extremely annoyed on the way it was being handled . My uncle was at home and had just a thirty minute chat with me .He spoke extremely frankly,explaining the situation as is with me .With an age difference of about 35 years, it was quite natural that i was listening and he speaking.

As always we tend to ignore advices from elders or even evade them when they speak to us on things which we feel are sensitive but today it was quite different , i could feel myself change and inspired as the talk went on.It was pure bliss.

What i realised today was that ,when things are spoken openly i.e. frankly , we tend to listen and it is such a relief that once spoken we know the answer to questions we had in our mind ,in one way or the other . It is not necessarily positive , can be negative answers as well but at least we do not need to be extremely tensed about the subject , as we already know what the answer is or where to start looking for. There is a clear sense of direction in the mind,which i think causes the relief.

It sounds so silly to write about these two incidents but the subject of discussion is the same , and there is an element of truth in saying that Frank Talk did help in both occasion.

We don't understand these until we go through the experience ,both of them were wonderful moments. Speaking is natural but Frank Talk is nature at its cracking best!

Spoiled for Choices

Recently many of my friends reminded me that i had not blogged during june , i was just thinking what do i need to blog about?

In the meantime my mind was running around to buy a mobile phone as my existing one had done its justice.

I eventually did buy a phone today but not without a fair share of drama and that i thought should be the topic for this blog.

I was just looking to buy a mobile to talk and be in contact . This statement or my want if you may call ,looks fairly simple to achieve.

You wouldn't believe ,it took me more than four weeks to buy . Why? The answer was quite simple, i was spoilt for choices that were thrown at me . Every time i made my mind to buy some thing , another one with a better feature was in the offing either at the same price or for a price slightly dearer.

Makes from big brans such as Apple, Sony, Samsung, Nokia to name a few. There are plethora of choices which blind the consumer. Within each brand there are many sub brands or models as these are called by the companies . Even these so called models have their own inner rival say a Apple Iphone 16G or a 32 G or a Nokia N 97 and another N series.

If you look carefully, the differences in these models , some of which are quite obvious to find but many just go unnoticed or some phone models could be so close that an average consumer would just not be able to understand why there is a price differential.

Then comes the new features which are pre tested by the companies before launch . Word of mouth gets the better of the conventional marketing. With so much in the offing and differences varying in degree from subtle to major differences . A consumer just buys what he likes or uses the time tested strategy of waiting for others to buy and let him know whether a product is good or not. This is not only in true in Mobile Phone market but also in durable or non durable goods .

It is just stunning to see the reversal of fortune, just a decade back when there were only few household names this could have been unthinkable but now product development and innovation not only have changed the lifestyle but also provides a wide range of choices for an average consumer, there is something in the offer for all kind of people.

The question is ,whether this is good or not ? In my opinion it is definitely good as there are choices to make.

At the end i did make my choice but only after lots of contemplation, after all isn't life all about choices!!

Motherhood and Working in Corporate Office

At the outset ,i apologize if this going to hurt some set of people but i just thought i write this any way.

What prompted me to write on this very topic, well it should only be my niece at home. 

These days one generally sees that women who are working , mainly focus on their careers,  which is really good . 

Gone are the days when men dominated every walks of life , more than ever before women are making their presence felt and in a very towering way. This is all good for a country raring to be the engine of growth and becoming a super power.

On the flip side what is happening is that once these women attain motherhood , they are caught between career and care taking .

Any one in this world would tell you , only a mother would understand what a kid would need . Agreed that  grand parents can do the same, but they can never replace the fondness of a mother, let alone taking care.

That being said , when the so called corporate woman is caught in this dilemma , what happens? First she asks for permission in her office to leave early or going on leaves to be with her kid in the name of spending time with family, can this happen consistently, probably not due to rules and regulations.

Although companies do allow maternity leave of up to 3 to 6 months , believe me this is just not enough. A kid doesn't grow up in six months and the first five years are extremely critical for the kid to grow up and be taken care of . These kids have razor sharp minds, if not cared properly , it is extremely likely that they get hold of habits which parents would not like them growing up with.

So with leave or permissions not an option , our folks take the step of arranging either the grandparents to take care or eventually a nanny is an option. Once this is done , they come to office thinking all is well, only to find that after an hour or two their conscience tearing them apart on how well the kid is managed back home.

Although our women folk look ok at this juncture  at face value but in reality they are emotionally drained and shaken at this predicament . They go on to curse their superiors for not understanding their plight and giving them too much work, then comes her husband for all things that have not worked since their marriage , then colleagues are in the line of fire for not understanding things, then her own parents and in laws. Well the list goes on .

Once back from office , the kid pampers her until late night again the curse mania starts as she has to go to work the following day with pile of targets staring at her . 

Neither the kid gets fair share of tenderness,pampering and care that is required nor the mother gets her fair share of happiness. This may sound bitter but is the brutal truth.

Who is to blame , ask the victim , likely answer  would be the in-laws and her husband. Is it really the case?

If you carefully analyze the situation, our corporate woman could have decided not to go to work, ultimately she decided not to, why?

Think hard, it might seem money is the deciding factor. Prima facia this might be correct but go one step higher you would stumble on the real issue.

The issue is both husband and wife planned all niceties like car,aircon,a good house based on both their salaries . If one of their salaries does not come , well it could mean trouble. At stake is kids welfare and paying of the monthly instalments , both of them very important in their own sense.

Our men folk should take more responsibility here and share the burden,they can but as i stated before no one on this earth can substitute a mother in a kids growth.

Chuck these niceties , it is high time people start thinking in this angle. I only write from what iam seeing but i think this is close to reality.

Expectations at workplace!

I was thinking about what would be the topic for my next blog ,when events over last two weeks finally convinced me that this should be what i need to write about.

If you think ,what am i going to write on a subject which depends on which way you look at it , think again. Let me tell you a good deal can be written about this subject and i'll try and see what i can.

Over last two weeks i have been speaking to many of my colleagues on various aspects about expectations at workplace. Many things came up during these discussions. They were as fickle as pens should be provided to as grandiose as exotic holidays sponsored by the organization. 

What was most striking was the difference in expectations from people with considerable experience and people with not so much, also differences emerged between the two sexes but was not that much.I will concentrate on the recent hopefuls.

One important aspect was how much the first timers crave for growth, specifically faster growth. It was just jaw dropping. In the recent past say about 8 to 10 years back, if you had worked for a good deal of five to ten years then you were expected to be a supervisor. Agreed in current environment, that may not be possible but what came out evident in my discussion's was that the current set of people entering the business environment although much better equipped than their preceding set and portray themselves as street smart as anyone can get , forget one important word "PATIENCE". They need to get things done in a stroke of a second.

In workplace they need promotions as quickly as even a year . Alas, this expectation is not going to take them any forward but most likely a step back. In our country many young people in the band of 20-21 years are starting to work in various sectors and are seen by many to be the backbone of the country. Yes, they have every right to be called so and i myself am supportive of  that but if they need to take our country to the next level, they need to have that golden word "Patience" embedded strongly in their minds .

Just to conclude - Rome was not built in a day , neither was our independence achieved in a year or two. As we know these events of great importance did happen but was only possible because people behind it had the will to achieve it but on top of it , they had truck loads of patience at their disposal.

Why IIM's are the way they are

Well an eight year dream nurtured and grown inside me finally bore fruit when i had a chance to spend one very informative week at IIM Indore . 

I was always crazy about getting into IIM's , because of two reasons. One of the reason is their brand and next the salaries that students from these institute command.

To me these were the primary reason. However i always used to think ok what is so great about the institute, what is that one thing that the other institutes offer in diluted manner.

Well i had to wait eight years to find out he reason. When i was there in IIM Indore last week, i did understand why the IIM's command such a respect. The one best thing that stands out is their Intellectual Capital. What an enormous amount of knowledge capital do the professors of these institute poses. I was stunned by their prowess in their subjects of expertise, not only that but what is even more striking is their ability to relate to various other subjects and convert it to a topic of their expertise. All the professors who had taught me in the one week had similar quality “Expertise” and their ability to connect with students from all walk of life by converting the subject to real life examples, my batch had work experience cutting across industries. At the end of every class one could find students enthusiastically asking questions and clarifying the concepts.

At the end of one week, it was an unanimous agreement to the statement “IIM’s command respect due to their intellectual capital”. Just imagine where would you find a professor educated at LSE and serving on the board of four companies would also be a professor taking lessons on International business? May be only in a handful of places but surely at the IIM's.

As for me it is just still unbelievable that I had stepped into the classrooms of the institute. What a week!